Wolverine Gets It Handed To Him By Juggernaut
by Sonata-Time-Nocturne-Flare-Aoi
Summary: Complete! Juggernaut's car gets hijacked, and the hulking mutant retaliates by trashing Xavier Mansion in search for the one person who stole it: Wolverine. Can Logan stop him, or get humiliated along the way?
1. Chapter 1

**Story**: Wolverine Gets It Handed To Him By Juggernaut  
**Author**: Master Jin Sonata  
**Written**: April 13th, 2010  
**Genre**: Humor  
**Rating**: T  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Marvel of its unfortunate hero I torment often. Muahaha.

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**Chapter 1: Embarrassment Instant**

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It was a day like any other at Xaver's Mansion. Our hero Logan was hard at work doing the one thing he loves doing the most…

"**Logan?! Are you in front of the TV again?!"**

…and that's doing absolutely nothing.

Logan was lying on the couch in the entertainment area of the mansion, drinking a beer, chomping rather loudly on some potato chips, and watching…daytime soap operas?!

Standing behind him was Scott Summers, the one usually nagging him day on out.

"**Look at you…sitting there wasting space. You should be ashamed at yourself,"** Scott says to his teammate, arms crossed in discontentment and disapproval.

"**Oh shut up will you? I can do whatever I want, because I'm the damn Wolverine, bub,"** Logan responds, shooting a glare at Scott.

"**Well the Wolverine is starting to get a little large around the waist,"** Scott responds, pointing to Logan's blatantly obvious beer-belly.

"**Okay pal…"** Logan annoyingly says, getting up and approaching Scott. **"You want me to prove I'm no slouch? Then I will,"** Logan says to him in a 'matter-of-fact' tone.

**BEEEEEEP! BEEEEEEP! BEEEEEEP!**

Suddenly, the alarms around the mansion began blaring.

"**What's going on? Are we under attack?"** Scott asks no one in particular.

"**Precisely, Mr. Summers,"** said Professor Xavier, rolling into the room shortly after.

"**So who is it this time, Chuck? Magneto? Sabertooth?"** Logan asks, yawning and scratching his belly unenthusiastically.

"**It's Juggernaut. According to the alarm system, he should be nearing the front lawn by now. He must be stopped at all costs,"** Professor Xavier says to them.

"**Why would Juggernaut come here? What do we have that he wants?"** Scott speculates aloud.

"**Probably the half-million dollar car I hijacked from his home the other night,"** Logan responds casually.

"**The WHAT?!?"** Both Xavier and Scott respond simultaneously in shock.

"…**What? He stole $50 from me last month, so I think this is an even trade,"** Logan said with a grin.

"**Logan, go out there and apologize for what you've done before Juggernaut destroys everything in sight, or no beer for a month,"** Professor Xavier says to him.

"**Oh fine…I'll be right back,"** Logan says with a sigh as he heads outside to deal with the hulking mutant.

**CRASH!!!!**

Within seconds Wolverine is seen crashing through the mansion window from the outside. Lying on the glass-sprawled floor, he lifted his head slightly and spoke.

"**The brown-bastard ain't in a talking mood right now…"** Logan grumbles, before falling out.

Both the professor and Scott look at each other and sigh.

It was going to be one long day.

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**End of Chapter 1**

**That does it for this chapter! Please review and stay tuned for the next!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Humiliation Direct**

Inside the professor's office, he, Logan, and Scott continue to watch as Juggernaut continues to trash the school's grounds in search for his stolen car.

"**This rampage is costing us thousands of dollars by the minute. Logan, where exactly did you park Juggernaut's car?"** Professor Xavier asks.

"**It's out back inside the garage,"** Logan responds.

"**You mean the garage encased in titanium alloy so thick that even Juggernaut can't penetrate?"** Professor Xavier inquires.

"**Well don't just stand there, go and bring it out for Juggernaut!"** Scott tells Logan.

"**Tsk, fine, I still say that oversized turd doesn't deserve it,"** Logan said with a sigh as he began to head outside again.

Both Xavier and Scott watch from the window as Logan approaches the giant foe. After an exchange of words between the two, Juggernaut began to follow Logan around back out of view toward the aforementioned garage.

"**I swear…that's all he had to do in the first place…"** Scott says to the professor.

"**I understand Logan's position. He's not necessarily the negotiable type,"** Professor Xavier comments.

"**Bull crap! That hothead doesn't know the first thing about negotiation. He just stabs first and asks questions later, **said the obviously skeptical Scott. **"Or in this case, gets his ass beat within seconds."**

"**Give it time, you never know what'll happen until it happens,"** the professor responds.

**CRASH!!!**

Logan suddenly crashes through the rooftop of Xavier's office, landing flat on his face before them.

"**Huh? What happened this time? Juggernaut got his car back didn't he?" **Professor Xavier asks.

"**No…he didn't…"** Logan said in a muffled voice.

"**What?! Well why not?"** Scott demands.

"**I told him I forgot the password to open the garage door…" **Logan responds, lifting his head up slightly.

Both men stare down at Logon with a disgruntled look of embarrassment and disappointment.

"…**What? It's true,"** Logan insists.

**End of Chapter 2**

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**That does it for this chapter! Please review and stay tuned for the next!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Dishonor Now**

It was now the evening, and Logan was still trying to figure out a way to give Juggernaut his car back while it lay sitting locked within the X-Mansion garage. Logan sat in the lobby of the mansion smoking a cigar, contemplating his next move.

"**So? Figured out something?"** asked Scott, who stood next to him, arms crossed and waiting for an answer.

"**Nope. Besides, its impossible to break into that garage and get that bastard's car without the password…that has somehow jogged my memory…"** Logan responds, puffing on his cig.

"**Whose bright idea was it to build an adamantium-alloy detach garage anyways?"** Scott questions further.

"**Um…mine…I think?"** Logan responds.

Scott sighs and began contemplating as well.

Suddenly, he had an idea.

"**Logan, just give Juggernaut enough money to buy him a new car,"** he insisted.

"**Heh, yeah right. Like I'm cleaning my entire bank account for that loser. Besides, I'm saving up to buy a new motorcycle."** (Refer to the other fic 'Wolverine Tries To Date Scott's Girlfriend' to learn why he has to buy a new motorcycle).

"**Well Logan, its either that, or have your ass beaten into the ground every moment you step outside of the mansion,"** Scott tells him.

A long low groan of annoyance slipped through Logan's lips as he stood and put out his cig. He left to go grab his credit card.

After all, this was his mess anywho.

After stepping outside with his card, Professor Xavier and Scott watch as Logan settles this little pointless conflict with Juggernaut.

"**Looks like Logan has found the proper solution to this," **Professor Xavier comments with a pleased look.

"**Yeah…still wonder how we're gonna pay for all this damage Juggernaut caused while Logan sat around doing nothing,"** Scott comments.

After Logan forks over his money, Juggernaut shakes hands and seemingly makes peace with Logan….

**WHAM!**

…before punching him away with a mighty swing, causing Logan to crash through the window where the professor and Scott stood. Juggernaut then finally left the mansion grounds.

"**Logan, what just happened? Why did he hit you before leaving?"** Professor Xavier asks.

"**The bitch was happy he got his money for a new car, but was still pissed that he missed the new episode of Desperate Housewives while waiting,"** Logan says with an annoyed grumble before falling out.

**End of Chapter 3**

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**The End!**

**That's it for this story! Please review, and thanks for reading!**


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